Home to Me
by YanksLuver
Summary: Based on spoilers for this week: Robin and Patrick deal with the aftermath of a surprise Robin has for Patrick then Patrick asks Robin an important, unexpected question.


Title : Home to Me  
Author : Steph  
Rating : PG  
Pairing : Robin/Patrick  
Category : Romance/Drama  
Disclaimer : I do this out of a love for this couple. No infringement is intended.  
Spoilers : Based on spoilers for upcoming week  
Summary : Robin and Patrick deal with the aftermath of a surprise Robin has for Patrick; then Patrick asks Robin an important, unexpected question.

Note : I read the Soaps in Depth article about spoilers for Robin and Patrick this week and got inspired. So, this is based on those spoilers and how I'd like to see everything play out. Thanks for reading and please let me know what you thought. –Steph

--- Home to Me: Part 1/1 --- 

Patrick unlocked the door to his apartment and allowed it to swing open. His eyes widened in surprise as they landed on the couch that sat in the middle of his living room. He took a few steps forward, his mouth dropping open slightly as he came to stand in front of it. His gaze scanned it, taking in the chocolate microsuede fabric.

"It came!" a familiar voice sounded behind him.

Patrick spun around to face Robin and pointed at the couch.

"You did this?"

A smile spread across Robin's face, as she rushed toward the couch to admire it.

"It looks even more gorgeous in this apartment!" She turned to face Patrick. "I arranged for your landlord to let the delivery men in when they came. He may be a bigot, but he's good for something."

Patrick ran a hand through his hair and nodded. "Yeah."

Robin eyed him, her smile still lingering on her lips. "Well?"

Patrick shrugged his shoulders. "Well what?"

"What do you think of the couch?"

Patrick glanced at the couch. "It's nice."

Robin's smile slowly began to fade and her brow furrowed. "That was less than enthusiastic."

"I just didn't expect to find a couch in my living room when I came home. You never told me you ordered it."

"Well, you refused to go to the store with me to see it and you did say to just order it and give you the bill."

Patrick squeezed his eyes closed, remembering the comment he had made while Robin was bugging him at work.

"That's true, I did."

"So, I thought I would take care of it all and surprise you."

"Well, I am definitely surprised."

Robin took a deep breath and met his eyes. "Is something wrong? Is it the color? Or the kind of fabric? Because I can-…"

Patrick plastered on a smile and walked towards her, wrapping his arms around her waist and looking down at her. "It's perfect. Thank you."

He then lowered his lips down to hers.

---

Less than fifteen minutes later, Robin walked into her apartment. Lainey and Kelly were sitting on the couch reading and looked up in surprise.

Lainey's brow wrinkled. "We didn't expect to see you home tonight."

Kelly smiled mischievously. "I thought for sure you'd spend the entire night christening that couch."

Robin flopped down on an armchair and placed her head in her palm. "Patrick said he was tired and wanted to crash."

"Uh oh," Kelly said. "I'm betting that's the first time he's ever said that to you."

Robin squeezed her eyes shut. "I think I screwed up."

"Why?" Lainey asked.

Robin shook her head. "He didn't seem thrilled about the couch. I mean, he told me to order it, but maybe he just said that so I would stop bothering him. I never even showed it to him before I ordered it and I didn't tell him that I had ordered it. I think I overstepped and now he probably thinks I am suffocating him. He probably thinks I am trying to control his life. He probably thinks that, before he knows it, I will have slowly, subtly moved myself in. You know how it goes. I leave a few items behind so it's easier when I stay over. And then a few nights a week turns into every night. Before you know it, I'm there more than I'm here."

"You'll still pay your part of the rent though, right?" Kelly asked with a tiny smile.

Robin chuckled. "Come on, I'm serious. This stupid couch could mean the end for us."

Lainey tilted her head. "If a couch can come between you, then I'm not sure you have much to begin with."

Robin sighed. "Lainey, you're a psychiatrist. You know this couch is symbolic. It's going to bring up all of the issues we have, all of the issues Patrick has. His issues with commitment, his Peter Pan complex. This couch is going to bring it all up. He's going to think I'm trying to control him and force him along a path he's not ready for. First, it'll be moving in without him asking me to or wanting me to and then it'll be getting him to put a ring on my finger."

Kelly pointed at Robin. "If you figure out how to get him to do that, let me know."

Robin let out a groan and covered her face with her hands.

---

Patrick spotted Pete sitting at a table at Jake's as he entered. Pete raised his beer glass up as Patrick took a seat across from him.

"Haven't seen you in a while. I guess Mommy gave you permission to stay out late tonight."

Patrick licked at his lips, his eyes moving down to the beer Pete had ordered for him. "I've been busy with work. And the move."

Pete leaned forward in his seat. "That's right. Robin finally got you to give up that hotel room. I'm sure you must be having a ball decorating it."

Patrick drank some of his beer and then set it back down. "Not me. Robin."

"You said she could decorate it?"

"She wanted to. She offered."

"And you let her," Pete said disapprovingly.

Patrick shrugged. "I came home today and found a couch I've never seen before."

"She just ordered a couch?"

"I sort of told her she could. She's just trying to help. She knows I don't have much time or interest in decorating, so she's helping me out."

Pete leaned back in his seat and shook his head, a grin upon his lips. "You are so screwed, man."

Patrick closed his eyes. "If this is going to be another rant about the evils of love and relationships, save it. I'm not in the mood and I've heard this one before."

Pete shook his head. "No rant. Just advice."

Patrick chuckled. "Advice? From you? You've never had a relationship in your life."

"That's not true. I told you Jenny Foley and I dated for three weeks."

"You also told me you were twelve, at summer camp and that you faked an allergic reaction so you would be sent home, rather than have to dump her."

Pete waved a hand in dismissal. "Forget Jenny Foley and just listen to me. I've accepted that you love this girl. Or at least you think you do. Fine. Whatever. That doesn't mean she has a right to control your life. You need to set boundaries before it's too late. I'm not entirely sure it's not already too late. Before you know it, she'll be moved in without you even realizing it. She'll leave some of her things, start spending every night and then when her lease is up on her apartment she'll decide there's no point in re-signing because she's never there. Then it's just a matter of time. She'll start talking about marriage and by then she will have convinced you that's what you want. You'll go out and buy the ring and that will be the official end of your life. From then on, it will be your life together, except you won't have any say in anything. Not how your money's spent or when you have kids or if you go on vacations with her family. She'll make every last decision. She'll even tell you when you're going to start having kids. And one day you'll look in the mirror and you won't recognize your own reflection. You will have disappeared and in your place will stand the man she wants you to be." Patrick stared at him, his mouth slack. Pete then shrugged. "But, hey, it's your life."

Patrick ran a hand down his face and muttered. "Are you sure that novel you're writing isn't a thriller? Because you sure know how to spin a tale that will scare the hell out of someone."

Pete simply laughed and brought his beer mug up to his lips.

---

Robin knocked on the door to Patrick's apartment a few days later and waited patiently for him to answer. After a minute or so, the door swung open, revealing Patrick in a gray t-shirt and a pair of sweats. His eyes widened at her.

"Hey," he said.

"Hi," Robin said. "We've both been so busy at work for the last few days, we've barely spent any time together. I thought we could order some dinner and watch a movie."

The truth was they'd both been avoiding each other, knowing that the couch had caused unexpected and unspoken issues.

Patrick moved to more fully block the entrance and rubbed a hand across the back of his head. "Yeah, um, I'm really tired. I think I'm just going to crash. But I'll see you tom-..."

Robin held up a hand. "You're using that again? I didn't believe you the first time. I thought you were just trying to get rid of me then and that's what I think you're trying to do now." Robin sighed, as she pushed past him, "Look, is this about the couch? Because after I left I-..." Robin's voice trailed off and she stopped dead in her tracks as her eyes landed on the large, empty spot in his living room where the couch had been a few days earlier.

Patrick squeezed his eyes shut and closed the door. He then turned on his heel. Robin spun around to face him and Patrick could tell she was suddenly fighting back tears.

"You could have just said you didn't like it," she choked out.

"I liked it."

Robin blinked a few times, as the tears began to sting her eyes. She raised her eyes to the ceiling. "Then you could have just told me the truth. That you thought I overstepped by ordering the couch without asking you or telling you."

"You were trying to help me, Robin. I didn't want you to think I was unappreciative. And I didn't want to hurt your feelings."

"And this was better? It was better for me to just come here and find that you'd returned it?"

"I was going to tell you."

Robin took a deep breath. "Look, I'm sorry if I overstepped. I don't want to control you. I'm not trying to take over your life or suffocate you. I just want you to have a home. I want you to come home from work to a comfortable place that feels like yours. But if that's not what you want, if you're not ready for that, then fine. This is your place and it's your life. I won't interfere again."

Robin brushed past Patrick, but he caught her by the elbow before she reached the door.

"Please don't go," he whispered.

Robin slowly turned around to face him. "Why shouldn't I?"

"Because I don't want you to. Not like this. Just listen to me, please."

Robin nodded. "Okay, fine."

Patrick took a deep breath and then let it out. "I talked to Pete the other day after the couch thing and he told me I needed to set boundaries. He said you were trying to take over my life, trying to control me. And in that moment it seemed like he was right. I'm used to doing my own thing. Making my own decisions. Not having to answer to anyone else. I guess I felt like I was losing who I am and that this couch was just the beginning. So I returned it."

Robin slowly bobbed her head. "I understand. And I'm sorry I made you feel that way. That was not my intention. You are your own person and you make your own decisions. I have no right to force on you what I think you want or what I feel is best for you."

"I just need time to do things the way I want to and when I'm ready to." Patrick took a step forward and brought his hand up to cup her face. "But none of that has anything to do with how I feel about you. Please don't think it does. Robin, you need to know how happy you make me. When nothing makes sense, when I'm not sure of anything, there's one thing I know for certain: that I love you and that you've made me happier than I've ever been in my entire life." A tear began to roll down Robin's cheek. Patrick swiped at it with his thumb. "No matter what happens, you never have to doubt that."

Robin swallowed against the lump in her throat and looked into his eyes. "I love you."

Patrick smiled and then lowered his lips to hers. He pulled back a few moments later and placed a kiss on her forehead, as he pulled her into his arms.

"You know," he said softly. "I may not have the couch anymore, but I've still got the air mattress."

Robin laughed softly against his chest.

---

Hours later, Robin and Patrick lay wrapped up in each other. Robin's head rested on Patrick's chest and his arm was snaked around her waist.

"This air mattress sure has come in handy," Robin said.

Patrick smiled. "Sure has."

"Maybe you'll never need to get a real bed." She then bit at her lip and looked up at him. "Unless you want one. Whatever. Whatever you want, whenever you want it." She then lowered her head again. "And don't worry, I have no intention of ever moving in here. This is your home."

Patrick stared silently at the ceiling.

---

The next night, Robin's hand was poised to knock, when the door suddenly swung open, revealing Patrick in a charcoal suit, looking as handsome as ever.

Robin drank him in and smiled, as she raised her eyebrows. "Wow, I didn't realize there was such a strict dress code for a night of eating pizza and watching a chick flick." Robin glanced down at her sweater and jeans. "I am woefully underdressed, apparently."

Patrick stared into her eyes for a long moment and Robin felt as if something had changed for him.

"You look beautiful," he whispered.

He then leaned forward and placed a kiss on her lips. As he pulled back, he took her hands in his and lead her into the apartment.

Robin's eyes widened and she sucked in a breath, as she surveyed the living room. Candles were lit everywhere, but that wasn't what took her breath away. The couch she had purchased for him was sitting in the center. On one side of the couch was a chaise lounge and on the other an armchair. The set also included a glass coffee table with four microsuede ottomans that could be stored under the table or used for extra seating. The look was completed by two glass end tables.

Robin shook her head in amazement, as she turned around to face him. "This is...incredible. But I don't understand."

Patrick shrugged his shoulders. "I really liked that couch and I figured it was time to christen something other than that air mattress."

Robin tilted her head. "You didn't do this to make me happy, right? Because you think it's what I expect from you. You did this because it's what you want, right?"

Patrick nodded. "It's what I want and it was time." He took a few steps forward and his eyes grew serious. "It was never about the couch, Robin. It wasn't even about what Pete said it represented. Look, I know you think I've been so hesitant to get my own place and make it feel like home because I have some Peter Pan complex. That I don't want to grow up. And I know that makes you feel like I'm not truly committed to this relationship and building a future with you-..."

"I don't think-..."

"Please, let me finish," he said, as he took a deep breath and looked into her eyes. "It's not that at all, Robin. The truth is, I haven't had a real home since my mother died. That home was filled with love and memories, and when she died it all just disappeared. I stopped going home because it stopped feeling like home. My mother was gone, my father was a shadow of himself and he had removed all remnants of my mother. After I graduated medical school, I rented a furnished apartment. It served as a place to sleep and hold my clothes. It was never home. When I came here, I figured I might as well just stay in a hotel room because my apartment had always felt like one anyway. You see, home to me has never been about couches or ottomans or coffee tables. It's about memories. It's about being with the people you love." He paused and swallowed hard. "I guess I just figured if I let myself build a home again, make memories with someone I love, then I would be setting myself up to have it all vanish again. That it would just be a matter of time until it all disappeared again."

Robin stared at him, her mouth hanging slightly open. "I had no idea you felt this way."

He shrugged his shoulders. "Why would you? Since my mother died, I operated under the belief that it was easier not to have anything of value because then I couldn't lose it. That's why it took me so long to admit how I feel about you. But now that I have admitted it and we're together, I realize that I already have a home. You're home to me, Robin. Wherever you are is home to me."

Robin smiled through the tears now streaming down her face and then wiped at them with the back of her hand. "You have got to stop making me cry."

"I make no promises," he replied softly with a grin.

Robin took a deep breath. "I feel the same," she said and closed the distance between them with a kiss. Then she pulled back and turned to scan the apartment. "Well, you may not need a couch or ottomans or a coffee table to make it feel like home, but I think it looks beautiful. It's perfect."

"Not quite. Something's missing," Patrick replied.

Robin turned back around to face him. "What?"

"You," he whispered.

Robin's brow furrowed. "Me? I don't understand. I'm right here."

"For tonight. But I want to know that you're going to fall asleep in my arms every night and I'm going to wake up to your beautiful face every morning. Like I said, Robin, home to me is where you are. We've already made some amazing memories in this place. I want to do that every night in our place."

Robin's eyes grew large. "Are you-..."

Patrick dug into the pocket of his pants and held a key up to her.

"Move in with me," he said softly.

Robin's head shook back and forth. "You can't be serious. I just promised last night that I wouldn't move in. I knew that wasn't what you wanted and that you weren't ready."

Patrick nodded. "Yeah, and when you left an hour later because you needed to get up early the next morning, I knew that this is exactly what I want and that I am more than ready."

"How can you be so sure? Just last night you were afraid of losing control over your life. I mean, living together? Patrick, that means giving up some control over your life. It means sharing a life with me, making decisions together."

"I know exactly what it means, Robin. And last night I realized that I've spent way too long concentrating on living my life alone. I'm ready to share it with someone. To share it with you."

"Well, I'm not sure we're ready."

"Look, we're going to make mistakes, but as long as we're honest with each other, we'll make it. Robin, without you, this is just another place to sleep and hold my clothes."

Robin chewed on her lower lip. "I just don't want to mess up what we have by rushing into something. We're not perfect, but we work. I'm just afraid that such a huge change so soon could hurt our relationship. We already see each other at work all day. If we live together, then we'll be coming home and spending every night with each other."

"We practically do that already anyway."

"But there will no escape. No place for either of us to seek refuge when we're driving each other crazy or when we just want to be alone."

Patrick's eyes narrowed at her. "This isn't about me not being ready or us not being ready, is it? This is about you not being ready."

Robin's mouth dropped open slightly and then she shook her head.

"I have to go," she said quickly, then brushed past him.

"Robin!" he called after her, as she rushed out the door and disappeared from view.

Patrick let out a heavy sigh and looked down at his hand, which still held the key. Then he walked over to the couch and sank down into it.

"Well, at least I have a nice, comfortable couch on which I can now sulk," he muttered to himself.

---

Four hours later, the sound of persistent knocking woke Patrick from a restless sleep. He'd fallen asleep on the couch. He rubbed at his face and then stood up, groaning at the wrinkled mess that was his suit.

"Coming!" he called grumpily, as the knocking continued.

He ran a hand through his mussed hair and then across his eyes, as he threw the door open.

He found Robin standing on the other side, smiling at him. He was suddenly alert.

"You know," she began, "I wouldn't have to disturb you with all that knocking if I had a key."

A slow smile spread across Patrick's lips. "Does that mean what I think it means?"

She nodded. "If the offer still stands."

Patrick shrugged and shook his head, "Well, actually, that offer expired four-..."

"Shut up," Robin said with a smile, as she crossed the threshold, wrapped her arms around his neck, and pressed her lips to his.

They slowly separated and Patrick met Robin's gaze. "So what changed your mind?"

Robin took a deep breath, "I drove around for a couple of hours, trying to convince myself that I had made the right decision. Then I went back to my apartment and I got into bed. I stared up at the ceiling for another two hours and I realized that I've been doing the same thing you have. It's been a long time since I've had a home. I thought that I could fill up an apartment with a couch and a coffee table and that would make it home. But you're right. Home is about memories and the people you love. I didn't have a real home in Paris and I haven't made one here. The truth is, you're home to me, Patrick." Patrick smiled, as she went on. "I guess I just was scared of building one and losing it. Growing up, I was bounced around so much, I never felt like I had a real home. My Uncle Mac finally gave me a place I could call home. And when I chose to leave it and have one with Jason, everything fell apart. I lost my home and I lost him. I guess I was scared that if I took this step with you that it would end the same way. And I just...I don't think I could stand it this time."

Patrick took Robin's hand in his and lead her to the couch. They sat down and faced each other.

Patrick met her eyes. "Let's make a pact."

Robin smirked, as her eyes narrowed. "Okay, but it better not involve sealing it with anything gross, like blood or spit."

Patrick chuckled. "Okay." He then met her eyes, "Let's promise to stop letting our pasts dictate our lives. We've both let them get in the way too many times. The truth is, we can't change the past and there's no point on dwelling on it. All we can do is try to learn from it and live everyday the best that we can. Before I met you, I thought I had my future figured out. I was going to continue to advance my career and have my pick of women to spend my nights with. That was it. Now, when I think of my future, it is so much brighter that I ever thought it could be. That's because of you. I can't imagine a future without you in it, Robin. And, yes, that's scary because we both know better than anyone that sometimes life throws you curveballs, that there are things that are beyond our control. But I let that fear, those 'what ifs', rule my life for too long. I won't do it anymore."

Robin nodded, a small smile on her lips. "I think that's a great idea."

"So it's a pact then?"

She bobbed her head. "It's a pact."

Patrick leaned in close to her, his breath tickling her lips. "Now how do we seal this pact?"

Robin smiled, her eyes focusing on his mouth. "Yes, how do we?"

Patrick grinned, his eyes following her gaze. "Ah, but you didn't want it to involve spit either, so I guess we're going to have to settle for a pinkie swear."

Patrick held his pinkie up and Robin's eyes moved to it. Dangling around his pinkie, was the key ring with her key attached to it.

Robin giggled and brought her hand up. She slowly removed the key from his finger and then playfully swatted his hand away.

Then she grabbed his tie, pulled him toward her and whispered, "About that spit thing...I think I can make an exception this one time."

She then covered his mouth with hers.

--------------------------------------------THE END--------------------------------------------- 

Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed it and please let me know what you thought. -Steph 


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